Comments on: Support systems

By: Kate Traylor

Kate Traylor — Sun, 05 Aug 2012 16:49:55 +0000

I think it depends on the genre you’re writing in. I write YA fantasy, and am in a general fantasy/sci-fi writers’ group, and that group is dominated by (brilliant, friendly, helpful) men. : )

By: Anon for a reason

Anon for a reason — Sun, 05 Aug 2012 04:40:24 +0000

I find both men and women supportive. But if you think women are more supportive and nurturing you should take a gander at what goes on in the romance world. These women are vicious and will stop at nothing to get attention. It is actually very entertaining to watch at times, especially in the mm romance sub-genre where so many women are pretending to be men. One actually hired a guy to go to book signings and pretend to be her. So I can’t agree that women are more supportive than men. I think it’s a balance.

By: D. C. DaCosta

D. C. DaCosta — Sat, 04 Aug 2012 00:00:54 +0000

It seems to me that, for whatever reason, women lack confidence in their talents and constantly second-guess themselves. Conversely, men tend to over-estimate their abilities.

By: EDWARD

EDWARD — Fri, 03 Aug 2012 21:13:47 +0000

(with apologies to Virginia Woolf) : Dryden once said, “Great wits are sure to madness near allied / And thin partitions do their walls divide;” Dryden’s sister, of course, disagreed. She said that great wits are inappropriate in the living rooms of decent people, it is very unpleasant to be a mad person, and comparing the two is totally unacceptable. (I found the sister’s exact words on the back of a Bob Dylan album). Things haven’t changed much from Dryden’s time. Few females can mentor anything but the next Fannie Flagg, which guys don’t like because it’s the next Fannie Flagg; males need mentoring from either gender, but it’s rare (as noted in the posts above) to find a guy who will sit still for directions. Especially directions from Dryden’s sister, which invariably include a U-turn.

By: Dalya

Dalya — Fri, 03 Aug 2012 19:57:49 +0000

I’d say there are more women writing than men, based on the mix I see at workshops and courses.

Women (speaking very generally here) have a very different communication style, and will chime in simply to agree with a blog post, whereas men will hold back and wait until they disagree, then speak up. Big difference.

I post in the Kindleboards Writers’ Cafe, where we have a great mix of guys and gals (at least according to their avatars!) It is, without hyperbole, the best place, EVAR.

By: Kerry Gans

Kerry Gans — Fri, 03 Aug 2012 16:30:41 +0000

There is a thriving writer’s community in the Doylestown/Philadelphia area. While this area has always been writer-friendly, the community has reached new levels largely due to the efforts of author Jonathan Maberry, who believes firmly that we lose nothing by lifting others up, and in fact we all win by being supportive of one another.

After starting numerous classes and groups on his own, Jonathan co-founded the Liars Club, a group of published writers. The Liars Club now teaches many of the workshops with Jonathan and sponsors the monthly Writers Coffeehouse in Willow Grove, PA. The original Coffeehouse has been so successful that the Liars have opened satellite meetings in Center City Philly, the Main Line, and Delaware, and hope to open one in Princeton and perhaps another location or two.

The Coffeehouse I attend seems to be almost half and half as far as men vs. women.

There is also a vibrant online Yahoogroup for this community–writerscoffeehouseonline–that has members from all over the country, if not the world.

I have found this group to be helpful and fun to hang with. I’ve learned a lot from them!

Kerry

By: Siri Kirpal Kaur Khalsa

Siri Kirpal Kaur Khalsa — Fri, 03 Aug 2012 03:49:41 +0000

I’m a member of Absolute Write, a huge online writing community. Many of its members are men, and some of its most helpful members are men.

And my husband reads directions better than I do.

Blessings,

Siri Kirpal Kaur Khalsa

By: Skye Taylor

Skye Taylor — Thu, 02 Aug 2012 19:47:47 +0000

I think Erika makes two really good points, having nothing specific to do with writing or any particular career, Men do tend to be DOERS and more competitive on average than women. In the same XX/XY frame of reference, how many jokes have been written about women refusing to ask for directions? Men, on the other hand….. There’s a reason for that – they are just wired differently. I watched my husband assemble dozens of Christmas projects in the guise of Santa over the years and no matter how many parts or how complicated the toy, he always ignored the printed directions – confident in the knowledge that he could figure this out on his own. Why waste time reading the instructions? So, why wouldn’t this characteristic carry over into a man’s writing. And if the individual isn’t inclined to ask for help, guidance, critique etc, why would he figure that a group of men doing so would be any different. Teaching or telling others how to do something is a whole different thing which is why they give workshops and teach classes even when they aren’t inclined to join or form support groups among themselves.

By: Erika @ Cinco de Mommy

Erika @ Cinco de Mommy — Thu, 02 Aug 2012 15:21:28 +0000

I think it’s just a xx/xy thing. From what I know of men — I have a husband, two sons, three daughters and one female dog — they just aren’t into bonding the way women are. They like to DO. My husband has a group of friends and they DO stuff together, whereas my friends and I are happy to sit around and talk about each other’s lives and problems and share our joys. And eat.